Break rigid and counter- productive mindsets

The Panchayat has said it’s apreventive measure to check instances of elopement amongst young people. At onelevel I find it amusing given that people eloped way before mobile phones wereeven created, but on another level I find the need to ‘control’people and deny them from leading normal lives, by self imposed guardians ofmorality, absolutely shocking. Elopement literally means, ‘to run away andnot return to the point of origination’ and is either about gettingmarried in a hurried, secretive manner or running away together with theintention of getting married. When the intention of a couple is to marryrespectably and spend a lifetime loving each other, why must they need to hideor run to obtain a respectable future?What I conjecture from thismobile phone ban is that a growing number of elopements must be scaring thevillagers. What is important for them to assess is why mounting numbers ofyoungsters are being forced to resort to such measures. Society is changing andwe too, must change rigid mindsets of ‘to whom, how and when’ ourchild will be married off! Parenting should never be about forcing your childinto any pivotal life changing decisions. It is about sensitivity to their needsand emotions and to be receptive to changing societal ideologies. I would muchrather let my daughter carry a mobile phone so that I can keep a concerned checkon her whereabouts, daily plans and safety, and she can call me if in trouble orin need. And if she’s getting married, I would most certainlywant to be dancing at her wedding and sending her off to her new life with asmile, blessings and happiness. We didn’t bear children to unfairlycontrol them, force them, or make themunhappy.If you have known, loved and trusted him for three years there is no real reason to be scared, especially since his intentions are to marry you. Meet his family and see how they feel about your relationship, your marriage plans and the possibility of your going against your family. If they are open and welcoming and you’re sure you’d like to take the plunge, then it’s time to sit down respectfully with your family and tell them so. Tell them you love them, respect them but the man you will spend the rest of life with must be your decision and you want them very much to open their minds and hearts to your choice and happiness. Perhaps, if his parents are open to it, they too can attempt to forge this alliance. If your parents reject it, just know you tried your best to give them a proper opportunity to be a part of your big day.Tell him you’d like to gift wrap the rotten two timing,lying and deceitful, confused, manipulative girl and present her to him, big redbow included, for a lifetime. Off your hands, off your chest, and off your phonelist! It’s the only way to deal with such deception. Be glad, notsad!!!Well youhave no one else to blame but yourself for this. Never mind, we live and welearn! No use crying over spilt milk so ‘better luck next time’ isabout all one can say to you at this juncture! Recognising opportunity andmaking the most of it is crucial to your personal and professional life, so honethat ability.She certainly seems to be the lady in charge, taking all theinitiatives from finding your number, calling you, proposing to you and nowignoring you. She’s been the decision maker all along and it’ssuited you fine till now. I suggest you take control, if you’d like tohave it, and make the effort to make her feel like she has someone she can leanon and just sweep her off her feet. If this is not possible given geography, orshe is unresponsive to you then you know the answer as well as I do!